What Recovery Looks like in Real Life: A Recovered Eating Disorder Therapist’s Perspective
There is a misconception about eating disorder therapy, that it should be a linear, fast line upward. Social media often shows only the “after” and not the daily realities. Talking about the messy middle isn’t...as fun. I am here today to explore what recovery actually looks from the perspective of an eating disorder therapist in New Jersey, but also a recovered athlete.
Recovery Isn’t a Single Moment, It is Ongoing
The way that I define recovery is the same way I may describe a friendship or relationship. It is bumpy and amazing at the same time. Without the fights, there is no real growth and vulnerability that brings you to this amazing place of fun and joy. However, the goal is not perfection, it is flexibility. Even in recovery, there will be days that feel hard. It is about being aware and having the skills to sit through the hard feelings and thoughts. We all have become irritated or upset about the person we love the most in the world. Our body becomes that person. We can love and respect it, even on the hard days.
What Eating Looks Like in Recovery
There are many reasons to eat in recovery. Whether it is for fuel, performance, enjoyment or connection, recovery means being in control to say yes. You are able to return to intuitive hunger cues, while also eating before hunger at times for performance or enjoyment. Flexible eating patterns become the norm, rather than rigid rules. Variety can be something fun and enjoyable, rather than scary.
What Movement Looks Like in Eating Disorder Recovery
Movement looks different for athletes in recovery. However, training from desire and strength rather than punishment is important. Rest days are honored without guilt. There is a separation of athletic identity from body size or output metrics. The healthiest athletes I have seen are ones that know who they are outside of their sport. Performance often improves because fueling improves, making room for consistency and proper recovery tools in training.
What the Mind Looks Like in Recovery
The mind can be a scary place when dealing with food noise and anxiety in eating disorder therapy. In recovery, food thoughts quiet down, making room for real values. The reduced obsession with numbers (ex. Calories, miles, macros, or weight) leads to more headspace for what is important to you. Believe it or not, with less food noise, comes confidence. When you are able to replace self-talk from criticism to compassion, it reduces the judgement and shame towards oneself.
What Social Life Looks Like in Recovery
In the beginning of eating disorder therapy, it may be difficult to be around others when eating. Eating disorder recovery feels different. Food brings connection and joy, rather than panic and compensatory thoughts. Community and support replaces secrecy and isolation. This can help you feel more connected with teammates and friends on and off the field.
What Setbacks and Hard Moments Look Like
These are all the amazing things that can come from recovery. However, like I said in the beginning, it is not all wonderful and joyful. Setbacks happen. There will be hard moments. Occasional intrusive thoughts or anxiety love to show their face during times of stress or overwhelm. This is why it is so important to practice self-care and have tools for navigating the hard moments. The key difference is that thoughts don’t control your behaviors anymore.
Performance Outcomes After Recovery
Over and over I see athletes talk about feeling stronger, having faster recovery and better endurance once recovered. They experience more energy, mental clarity and emotional stability. Athletes who fuel well, have long-term health and stability in their sport. This is not just through the athletes I see, but I got to experience it in real life. Injuries reduced and my body could handle more intensity. Not only that, but I enjoyed running again, after years of it feeling like punishment.
What Freedom Looks and Feels Like
Food is a part of life, not the center of it. The ability to be present during training, meals, relationships and more, is all due to having food freedom and flexibility. Recovery becomes your baseline, not your daily battle. Eating disorder recovery is possible, real and worth the work. However, it is really tough to do alone. Seeking support from an eating disorder therapist for athletes can be the start of your journey towards food freedom. Share this with someone who needs hope. Reach out if you’re an athlete craving freedom, not just performance.
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If you are looking for eating disorder therapy outside of New Jersey, do not worry! Serendipity Counseling can see folks virtually in Maryland, Pennsylvania, Vermont, Florida and Arizona. If 1:1 therapy is not the right fit for you, check out the featured eating disorder podcasts and other eating disorder blogs. Serendipity Counseling also offers an athlete support group to those looking for further support.
About the Author: A Recovered Eating Disorder Therapist for Athletes
Kate Ringwood became an eating disorder therapist for athletes after her own battle with an eating disorder while running competitively. Kate opened up Serendipity Counseling with the hope to support others in their journey to finding food freedom and becoming the best athletic version of themselves.
