Supporting an Athlete in Eating Disorder Treatment Through the Holidays: A Thanksgiving Guide
The holiday season around Cherry Hill, New Jersey is unlike any other. The streets of Haddonfield main street are lit with lights, the activities in town are like no other. But events like the Turkey Trot 5k down Haddon Ave or the “Big Brunch” are great examples of how food can be the center focus, making it extra difficult for those in eating disorder treatment.
Thanksgiving is meant to be about connection and gratitude, but for athletes in eating disorder treatment in New Jersey, it can be one of the most challenging days of the year. Between the food, body image concerns and performance pressure of championship seasons, the holidays become a difficult time to relax and enjoy the day. If you are trying to understand what your loved one is experiencing and how to support them without adding pressure, this blog is for you!
Why Thanksgiving Can Be Especially Hard for Athletes in Eating Disorder Treatment
For starters, food is central to the day. This alone can lead to heightened anxiety. However, fearing comments around food and body such as, “You earned it” or “Don’t ruin your training!” can be incredibly triggering. Conversations about “burning off” food or “getting back on track Monday” reinforce harmful messages that emphasize diet culture. Athletes may already feel guilty resting or eating differently from their usual meals.
The lack of structure around breaks or travel can also heighten anxiety and lead to feeling a loss of control. Whether there is no time to workout, their team has off or just their typical day to day schedule is different, a lack of structure can lead to feeling overwhelmed and on edge. Many athletes are learning to redefine what health and discipline mean and holidays put the in a vulnerable position that tests their growth.
Before Thanksgiving: Preparing with Compassion
Having an open conversation with your loved one can making going into the holidays less scary. Asking how you can make the day easier is a great place to start. Questions such as, “Would it help to plan the meal together?” or “Is there anything you would like me to make this year?” can offer a safe option when the day is already overwhelming.
Planning for flexibility by discussing alternatives options can help them feel prepared for the unexpected. This may be discussing taking the day off without guilt or going for a walk instead of a workout.
Talking about the boundaries they need is the next step to helpful conversations. Agree to skip the body comments, food judgements and talk about training if those are triggering for them and having a plan if things do come up. For example, coming up with a signal to step outside, take a short drive or sit in a quiet space if a breather is needed. Giving them the agency can help reduce anxiety and foster trust in your relationship.
During the Holiday; Supporting Your Athlete in the Moment
At the moment, it can be hard to remember what to say or identify what is needed. These are a few types of things to focus on, that can foster a less stressful environment when tension is high.
Focus on Connection, not consumption:
Talk about gratitude, memories or upcoming races, rather than calories or food choices.
Avoid comments about food or body:
Even compliments like “You look so strong!” can trigger self comparison. Avoiding any comments or compliments about bodies reduces comparison and potential triggers.
Normalize rest:
Remind them that recovery days, physical and mental, are part of being a healthy athlete. Normalize days off by being a positive example. Show them that it is okay to not workout every day.
Model flexibility:
Just let modeling rest is important, you can model flexibility. Show that it is okay to enjoy a holiday meal without “earning it” or “making up for it later”.
Offer gentle grounding:
If they seem overwhelmed, suggest a walk, a few deep breaths or a quiet check-in. Use the signal identified beforehand!
After the Holiday: Keep the Support Going
Check in, don’t critique: Ask them how they are feeling or how they feel the day went, instead of “you seemed fine” or “you did so great”.
Validate the Effort:
Recognize how much courage it took to show up and participate. Showing them you understand this was not easy, let them know, you get it and you care.
Encourage ongoing care:
Remind them that eating disorder recovery and sport can coexist with the right support and mindset. Encourage them to schedule a therapy appointment to help them process the holiday.
Reflect together:
Asking questions together such as, “What worked well this time?” or “What could make future holidays smoother?” shows that you are invested in their long term recovery process.
An Eating Disorder Therapist’s Reminder for Families and Teammates
Athletes in recovery are learning to rebuild their relationship with food, rest, performance and their body. This takes time. The goal is not perfection, but rather, progress. Small gestures of compassion can make the difference between a triggering experience and a healing one. Encourage loved ones to focus on connection, curiosity and care, not control. If needed, professional support can help both the athlete and their family navigate their high-pressure moments. Programs such as, ANAD offer free support groups during the holidays to help those in eating disorder recovery process the holiday before and after.
Redefining Thanksgiving: Gratitude Beyond the Game
Thanksgiving can become a day of gratitude for the body’s strength, not just what is on the plate. Celebrate the whole person, not just the athlete. Let gratitude lead the day.
Call to Action: How to Get Started
Serendipity Counseling offers 1:1 support for athletes and their families looking for support through eating disorder recovery. To start your process, following these steps:
Contact Serendipity Counseling to schedule a free 20 minute consultation session.
Meet your therapist and start the journey to food and body freedom in the first session.
Gain a healthy relationship with your body as you become the healthiest athletes and version of yourself!
If you are looking for support outside of New Jersey, you are in luck! Check out our telehealth therapy in NJ, PA, MD, VT, AZ and FL. If you are looking for support beyond 1:1 therapy, check out our “Retired” Athletes support group, along with our featured eating disorder recovery podcasts.
About the Author: A Therapist for Eating Disorders in Athletes in New Jersey
Kate Ringwood, LPC is an eating disorder specialist that works specifically with athletes in recovery. Her background as a collegiate athlete going through her own recovery journey, led to her deep passion for guiding others through the same. Kate is here to provide you with the hope that you may be struggling with in your eating disorder treatment journey.
