Why Athletes Struggle to Let Go of Their Eating Disorder (and What Actually Helps)
Imagine an athlete so determined and dedicated to do everything right. They go to bed early, try to eat the “perfect” foods, push themselves at every practice and workout, and listen to their coach to a T. Yet, they are finding themselves exhausted, drained, overwhelmed, and fatigued. They know they aren’t eating enough, but fear if they eat more, they will get slower. Roomers zoom around the team that being lighter will make them faster, yet their last race, they totally bonked.
Eating disorders in athletes are not about having a lack of motivation. It feels as thought it once served a purpose. Being scared and fearful of recovery is normal. I am here to help you understand why letting go is so hard, and what can actually help you move forward.
Athletic Culture Reinforces Eating Disorder Traits
Perfectionism, discipline and mental toughness are praised in the athletic world. Sports culture can blue the line between dedication and disorder. Messages that athletes receive around body size, performance and “earning” food can create a toxic culture that leads to under-fueling. Athletes often receive praise when the eating disorder begins, which reinforces the disorder behaviors.
The Eating Disorder Becomes Part of Athletic Identity
From a young age, athletes are taught to define themselves by their performance and how much they can control their performance. They are put in different levels of their sport, based on their ability or different weight classes based on their body size. If performance declines or they need to stop training, they feel lost in who they are. The eating disorder fills the gap, providing structure, rules and a sense of purpose. Letting go of the eating disorder can feel like losing one’s self, not just a behavior.
Control, Safety and Predictability in an Uncertain World
Eating disorders in athletes are sometimes a coping strategy during injury, transition or stress. For example, the transition into college is a time where eating disorder behaviors tend to start. Restriction or rigidity around food, creates an illusion of control when things are scary or stressful. Athletes are especially vulnerability during uncertain times like injuries or forced rest, retirement from competition or transitions from college, professional level or post-sport life.
Fear of Body Change and Performance Decline
Eating disorder in athletes may not start with intensions to change your body. However, the fear of gaining weight get decreasing performance often becomes significant. Grieving the body that athletes believe they “need” to succeed is a part of the recovery process. There are many myths around body size and performance and it is important to separate them. Under-fueling impairs performance, recovery and mental clarity in sport. Strength, endurance and focus improves with adequate nourishment.
Why “Just Let it Go” Doesn’t Work for Eating Disorders in Athletes
An eating disorder is a mental health disorder. It is not logical, but rather stems from emotions. Therefore, logic alone doesn’t override the fear. Shame and self-blame are often barriers to recovery and need to be worked through in order to sustain recovery. Athletes are doers. They often feel they “should know better” ad struggle to ask for help.
How To Let Go With An Eating Disorder Specialist
Eating disorders in athletes are about so much more than the food. Working to rebuild identity beyond the eating disorder includes working on things like values, relationships and purpose. Learning who the athlete is without constant self-punishment and shame is one step in the recovery process. Another step is addressing the function of the eating disorder, such as identifying what the eating disorder provides, whether it is control, numbness or predictability. Replacing it with a safer and more sustainable coping skills teach the athlete how to work through difficult emotions, rather then control them. Recovery is not able eliminating hard emotions, but rather sitting with uncertainty and distress.
What Letting Go Actually Looks Like
Letting go of the eating disorder does not mean you are losing discipline or letting go of your goals. It means you are fueling performance, recovery and long-term health. It does not mean becoming “soft” or unmotivated. Chosing recovery means redefining strength. I often tell folks that chosing recovery is the harder choice. It is strength. It is also a skill, not a switch. Having grief and fear during the recovery process is normal. Athletes do not need to give up excellence. However, the eating disorder is just self-harm disguised as discipline. Support and compassion make letting go possible.
The Next Steps Towards Eating Disorder Recovery
If you are looking for support in your freedom from disordered eating, Serendipity Counseling is here to help. Take these steps to start your journey.
Schedule a free 20 minute consultation call.
Determine if we are a good fit for you and set up you first session.
Start your journey towards trusting your body and experiencing food freedom!
If 1:1 counseling does not feel like the right step for you, check out more blogs on what recovery looks like or our featured eating disorder podcasts. Serendipity is here to support you where you are in your athletic journey.
About the Author: An Eating Disorder Specialist in NJ
Kate Ringwood is an eating disorder therapist in NJ She offers virtual and in person support for athletes struggling with eating disorders in New Jersey, as well as virtual eating disorder therapy in NJ, PA, MD, VT, FL and AZ. Kate is here to meet you where you are in your recovery process and support your athlete goals.
