How to Overcome Binge Eating Disorder
Do you struggle with feeling out of control around food? Almost like an addiction to eating or an out of body experience where the drive to eat completely takes over? Don’t worry, you are in the right place! As an eating disorder therapist, I see this struggle often. Binge eating disorder is the most common of all eating disorders. So let’s dive in on what to do next.
What Is Binge Eating Disorder?
Binge eating disorder is a mental health disorder that involves consuming large amounts of food in a short period of time, while feeling out of control. There is intense guilt, shame or distress after and may result in eating quickly or in secret. Unlike bulimia nervosa, binge eating does not involve a compensatory behavior such as purging or over exercising. Ultimately, binge eating disorder is not a failure of willpower. It is a nervous system response and a learned coping strategy.
Why Binge Eating Happens
To recover, you have to understand the binge cycle. Binges usually start with restriction. This means either physical or emotional restriction of food. The body goes into protection mode and starts to send signals such as urges or cravings. This results in a binge episode, followed by feelings of shame and guilt. The shame leads to more restriction and the cycle repeats. Binging however is not the problem. It is the symptom of restriction and emotional overwhelm.
Step 1: Stop Dieting
This is one of the hardest parts. Dieting is one of the leading predictors of binge eating. In this context dieting means any mental or physical restriction including, skipping meals, "saving calories", cutting out food groups, trying to eat "perfectly", labeling foods as "good" or "bad". Your brain looks at restriction as famine. When it senses famine, it increases cravings, food obsession and urges to eat as much as possible quickly. This is not about willpower or discipline. It is biology.
What to do instead
Restriction can make it difficult to tell if you are actually feeling hungry or full. Shifting from dieting to regular, consistent nourishment is key and working with a registered dietitian and mental health professional to help guide your body to have trust again is important. Developing healthy eating patterns usually looks like 3 meals and 2-3 snacks per day. It is important to eat about every 3-4 hours to help build that trust back. Consistency can reduce binging frequency dramatically.
Step 2: Remove Food Rules
Food rules drive binge eating through physical and mental restriction. Eating disorders love to create rules that keep you stuck in the restrict - binge cycle. Here are a few examples of common food rules:
“No carbs at night”
“I can’t keep snacks in the house”
“I have to earn dessert”
“I shouldn’t eat if I’m not hungry”
“I need to burn this off tomorrow”
"Protein needs to be the main focus of a meal"
Food rules create scarcity. Scarcity creates urgency. Urgency leads to binging.
Recovery work
It is recommended to work with a mental health profession, such as an eating disorder therapist to help you challenge these rules. Treatment looks like starting small and slowly working your way through food exposures to reduce the power food holds over you. As you work towards neutralizing language around food, you learn to eat foods you enjoy, instead of binging on them later.
Step 3: Understand Emotional Triggers
Binge eating is partially about restriction but also often about emotional regulation. Common emotional triggers include, stress, loneliness, anxiety, anger, sadness, overwhelm or perfectionism. Binge eating feels like it works because it numbs the overwhelming emotions and releases dopamine to create more comfort and distract from stress. Binging is often described as an out of body experience because of this. The goals is not to remove the binging immediately, it is to build additional coping tools. Self reflection is an important part of a binge as well. It is important to get curious and see what you can learn. This can include asking yourself questions like these:
What was I feeling before the binge?
What happened earlier today?
What did I need but not get?
Step 4: Break the Shame Cycle
Shame is fuel for binging. Think of the shame that comes up after a binge episode and what happens afterwards. For most this fuels restriction and the cycle continues. It keeps the eating disorder alive! If we can break through the shame, we can disrupt the whole cycle.
Shame Recovery
Breaking the cycle means working on shame. The one thing that beats shame is vulnerability. This is why we want to start getting curious and asking ourselves the questions above without judgment. Being aware and educating yourself on what is going on with your feelings and response to those feelings is a great place to start. The next step is continuing to have your next meal, not restrict or compensate. Remember, recovery is built through consistency, not perfection.
Step 5: Regulate Your Nervous System
Binge urges are a way of trying to numb the nervous system. When the system feels unsafe or overwhelmed, it looks for comfort and quick. Food is just that! Working to regulate your emotions reduces binge urges. Here are a few helpful tools to help you get started on your regulation journey!
Slow breathing (4–6 breaths/minute)
Cold water on face or hands
Going outside
Talking to someone safe
Journaling feelings before eating
These tools create space between urge and action.
Step 6: Normalize Hunger and Fullness
Many people with binge eating disorder struggle to trust their hunger cues. Years of dieting and disrupting the body's signals, makes it very difficult to have trust with what your body is trying to tell you. Recovery means relearning body cues and not trying to control them. Rebuilding trust with your body means building habits like eating when moderately hungry, accepting that hunger changes daily, and sitting through the discomfort of the unknown. Perfection is not required here. Setbacks happen. Trusting your body again takes patience and time.
Step 7: Expect Urges During Recovery
Urges are natural when you have had certain patterns of thinking and doing for so long. They do not mean failure. They mean your brain is learning new patterns. Urges are temporary when you stop restricting and allow yourself to have previously forbidden foods. Challenging the food rules and sitting through the uncomfortable feelings is how to make the biggest impact. Urges peak and fall like waves. Most last for about 20-30 minutes.. Instead of trying to fight the urge, try to ride it. Get curious. Learning to ride the way is much easier said than done, so do not be afraid to ask for support from an eating disorder therapist.
Step 8: Build a Support System
Recovery is much harder alone. There are different types of support for eating disorders. This can look like individual therapy with an eating disorder therapist or nutrition support from a registered dietitian that works with eating disorders. Support groups are offered at all different stages of recovery to help you feel less alone throughout this process. Lastly, do not forget to lean on trusted friends and family members. Treatment is exhausted. Even if you simple need tangible support from those around you, like grocery shopping, distractions to ride the wave, or a buddy to have a meal with, your loved ones are there to help! Binging and shame thrives in secrecy. The healing happens through connection with yourself and others!
Step 9: Redefine Health and Body Image
Many people try to recover while still trying to lose weight. There is a lot of complexity to this because restriction is often required with purposeful weight loss. As we know, that is a key driving factor to binge eating. Through recovery, I encourage you to shift focus from body weight and appearance to behaviors. A healthy weight looks different for everyone and having a healthy relationship with your body image is complex. If can sometimes feel impossible to have hope when feelings of negativity flood your mind. However, by working to improve your relationship with food through these steps recovery can start to feel possible, one day at a time.
When to Seek Professional Help from an Eating Disorder Therapist
Finding help is hard and getting the courage to ask for it is even harder. The same that comes with binge eating disorder makes you want to hide from the world. I cannot promise you many things in life. However, I can promise you that getting support increases your chance of full recovery. Yes, I said it. Full recovery is possible. Binge eating disorder is actually the most common eating disorder out there. Yet, the shame leads folks to not get treatment. You are not alone in thinking you don't classify as "sick enough" for help. Most that walk in my door have the same thoughts. So here are a few things to look out for. If you relate to any of these, you are in a place to benefit from support from an eating disorder therapist.
You feel out of control around food
You constantly diet or restrict
Food and weight dominate your thoughts
Shame or secrecy surrounds eating
You have an intense fear of gaining weight
You eat alone or hide food
You find yourself feeling extremely sick after eating
Final Thoughts and How to Get Started on Recovery
If you take one thing away from this, I want you to understand that binge eating disorder is not about willpower. It is biology, psychology, and survival. Recovery is found through consistency, self-compassion, emotional coping skills, eliminating restriction, and building support. You are not broken.
At Serendipity Counseling, we offer different types of support, depending where you are in your journey. We offers other types of support such as blog posts and featured podcasts about eating disorders, as well as individual counseling support to those struggling with binge eating disorder. We are here to support you through your recovery. Follow these steps to see if we are a good fit for you:
Ask any questions about binge eating, therapy or treatment and see if we are a good match.
Get started on your process to food and body freedom!
About the Author: A Compassionate Eating Disorder Therapist
Kate Ringwood is an eating disorder specialist that focuses her treatment methods on evidence-based models to help guide you through recovery. Kate takes a weight neutral and health at every size approach, helping you feel comfortable no matter your size, shape, age, gender or identity.
